The Giant Marlin, Sushi Clock, and Dirty Curtain Should Have Told Me to Turn Back: Kaizuka Sushi in Culver City

You know when you're pissed that you've had such a crappy meal that you wish you could reverse time and start over? Yes, my friends, this was our lunch yesterday at Kaizuka. After our little adventure at the Domino Bazaar, Sam and I headed back onto Culver to try out this grilled cheese place called Meltdown. How can you go wrong with a place that specializes in grilled cheese? Our plan went awry when we bumped into my old friend from MTV that was eating there with her friends and family. She told us that the place was just ok – so our hungry eyes glanced over to Kaizuki…lots of people there, must be good, we thought. OH HOW I WAS WRONG! HOW I WISH THE EATING GODS HAD MERCY ON ME! So we peek our curious heads inside and notice that big marlin and sushi clock on the wall. Now why I didn't think to turn around and march on out after seeing that is beyond me. What kind of authentic sushi place has a sushi clock on the wall?! (Kicking myself #1)

Sure there was no cohesive theme to this place – randomness everywhere – but perhaps there was a method to this decorating madness – perhaps they spent so much money on the fresh fish that they neglected to create an interesting environment! (Kicking myself #2) And where were the Asians? Sure this is Culver City but us Asians eat Asian food all the time…especially sushi! (Kicking myself #3) We order way too much (typical of oversize Asians) – tempura udon, dynamite, uni, ikura, scallop roll, spicy tuna roll, black cod…

Let me just tell you that looks are deceiving. The sushi, not pictured here, is not fresh at all – the ikura (salmon eggs) are sticky and don't pop quickly in your mouth. They don't even try to hide the older sea urchin pieces under the newer ones and the scallops tasted so slimy we swore we were going to get stomach aches in a few hours. The black cod was in a sake glaze instead of a miso one and the udon tasted so bland I could have had something eons better from a ready made pack from Mitsuwa. Service was slow, there were about five tables waiting for their checks and the lone patio waitress just couldn't catch a break. 3 1/2 stars yelpers? Really? I'm giving it 1. (‘Cause you can't give zeroes.) Avoid at all costs. Kaizuka (Yelp) 9729 Culver Blvd Culver City, CA 90232 (310) 253-5038

Popular On The Web

From Our Partners